Week 2 Recap
By Commissioner Tim
Week 2 Recap
Week 2 has come and gone and it brought with it many ups and downs all across Lounge Ballin’. Let’s begin your Tuesday morning with a Twisted Stat Tuesday, here it is: Only 1.4 points for separates the 2-0 Clifton Crackpipes from the 0-2 kokmagics. Talk about unlucky!
Speaking of the koks, let’s start with their matchup against the Clifton Crackpipes. The koks locker room was getting a bit kooky when it came to breaking the 0-15 franchise curse this week. Coach Mike Penis attempted to change the culture of the team by renaming the team locker room to the “koker room”. This resulted in the team trending on X (formerly known as Twitter) with the hashtag #kokerIhardlyknowher. Early signs pointed to a little bit of magic for the koks as they opened at -180 from Caesar’s Sportsbook. However, a tragic case of Erectile Dysfunction plagued them late on Monday night and their 75% win chance evaporated as the Crackpipes came from behind to back shot the kokmagics. The Crackpipes now sit alone atop the Synthwave Division at 2-0. Elsewhere, Team MeekDADDY obliterated the Chungus Champions 146-95 in embarrassing fashion. This was one of the most talked about matches of the early season and the Chungus Champions fell completely flat. To make matters worse for the Champions, their Star running back Nick Chubb is now out for the season after 400lb Champions coach Nikocado Avocado accidentally sat on his knee. At the very least, Champs fans can look forward to the lucrative branding deal that the team signed with Boot Barn at the beginning of the week…
Ladies and gentlemen what happened to the Boise Bussies? The once glorious and prestigious franchise has fallen to 0-2. To make matters worse, they have only put up 144 points all season. That’s the second lowest only behind the Hamilton Heroin Heroes with 126. After the Bussies you have to go all the way up to The Herd with 178 for the next lowest. We are only two games into the season, but is it time to rebuild in Boise? There are glaring holes at wide receiver and they sit in a division putting up truckloads of points. It will be an uphill battle from here on out for the Bussies. They have a great ownership group and passionate fans in Boise and it’s a damn shame to see them fall so far. Trending Highs and Lows:
Covington Catgirls ⬆️: (2-0) The Catgirls handled The Herd this week to go 2-0
Team MeekDADDY ⬆️: (2-0) Team MeekDADDY destroyed the Chungus Champions and now has the highest points for in the league.
Clifton Crackpipes ⬆️: (2-0) The Crackpipes came from behind to beat the kokmagics and move to 2-0.
The Trennins Qwerty ⬆️: (2-0) The Trennins Qwerty is silently becoming one of the best teams in the league. They are only a few points away from most points for and are now 2-0.
LA VertiBoys ⬆️: (2-0) The LA VertiBoys are proving they can hang with the heavyweights in the Protobot Division.
Fairport Phishermen ⬆️: (2-0) The Phishermen own the Brite Divison thus far on their quest to repeat as champions of Lounge Ballin’.
kokmagics ⬇️: (0-2) The koks lost a game they were favored in to fall to 0-2.
Hamilton Heroin Heroes ⬇️: (0-2) The Heroes had another low scoring performance this week.
Sween’s Weens ⬇️: (0-2) Brock Purdy had a down week coming in for Aaron Rodgers. Is he the long term solution?
Chungus Champions ⬇️: (0-2) The Champions lost their rivalry game to Team MeekDADDY this week.
Boise Bussies ⬇️: (0-2) The Boise Bussies left the field amidst a chorus of boos on Sunday. Their lackluster start is emblematic of a much deeper problem.
HF GNUs 🟰: (0-2) The GNUs lost to the Fairport Phishermen but put up a decent score. Their 0-2 start is not representative of their team.
Weekly Awards
In year two of Lounge Ballin’ we will hand out two awards per week. The first of these is the SwoleKonnor Award.
This award is presented to the week’s strongest team as voted on by you, the reader. This week’s nominees are:
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Team MeekDADDY, who made the Chungus Champions call them daddy as they destroyed their rivals and put up the most points in Lounge Ballin’ this season (146)
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The Clifton Crackpipes, who came from behind to beat the kokmagics and improve to 2-0.
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The LA VertiBoys who are now 2-0 after topping Sween’s Weens in a much talked about matchup
The SwoleKonnor Award for Week 2 was awarded to Team MeekDADDY!
The Wide Konnor Award is presented to the week’s worst performer or for the most embarrassing blunder. This week’s nominees are:
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The kokmagics, who lost embarrassingly to the Clifton Crackpipes. The koks were favored to win yet lost on Monday night. For koks fans this is a script that is becoming all too familiar…
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The Chungus Champions who lost their rivalry game and their superstar running back.
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The Boise Bussies, who had another lackluster performance to drop them to 0-2 with second fewest points scored in the league.
